Lent 2018 - Day 20

Another entry in the Lent diary from my friend who is fasting from food during this season:

Monday, March 5, 2018         Day 20 of Lent

            I realized I haven’t written in this journal for the better part of a week, so I wanted to write today.  Today is eating day, which is wonderful!  The past few days I’ve had more hunger spells, which makes sense as I’ve eaten only three days of the last 20.  I started drinking a bit of chocolate milk on Thursday, in part to keep my energy at a decent level, but also in part to help with my body healing.  The doctor said that my lack of nutrition has probably slowed my body’s healing process, so my back pain has lingered.  I was able to see him last Thursday and he gave me an injection that acts as an anti-inflammatory. 

            My prayer life has been steady and good.  I still hunger to feel more intimacy with God – or maybe to just be more aware of God’s presence and how close he is to me.  Last week’s prayer – for the 2nd week of Lent, really hit me a few times:

O God, whose glory it is always to have mercy: Be gracious to all who have gone astray from your ways, and bring them again with penitent hearts and steadfast faith to embrace and hold fast the unchangeable truth of your Word, Jesus Christ your Son

Praying that God would be gracious to all who have gone astray – and believing that God would be gracious with me, was a helpful thing. 

            Finally, one thing that is happening as my fast continues, and I don’t know if this is something with blood sugar or not, but I get more task oriented and focused.  My productivity increases, but it’s not as fun.  Also, I am going to bed earlier and earlier.  Partly because I’m tired, but also because I usually snack at night, and with that gone I don’t enjoy the evenings as much.  It is fascinating how emotionally dependent I am upon food.  My prayer is that as my dependency on food is stripped away, my reliance upon God will grow.